“Now’s an Ideal Time to Bring in Snoopers Charter” the Party Says After Woolwich Killings

LONDON – England – Sometimes coincidence is purely considered, and sometimes the Hegelian Dialectic is all too obvious for those who can see things properly.

“The enemy is all around us. You must report your neighbours. Your children must report their parents for any indiscretion. You are all now being watched very, very closely and thanks to the Woolwich killing by some brainwashed young angry men, we will enforce the Snoopers Charter which we have been waiting to introduce for a while. It’s rather coincidental that these easily controlled killers were of course pawns in a much larger game. Who knows who was really controlling them? Islam got the blame, as in every other terror exercise, that religion is a very useful tool for our own needs. Remember, War is Peace, Freedom is Slavery and Ignorance is Strength,” a member of the Inner Party said yesterday from the Ministry of Truth.

Totalitarian Creep

The Inner Party source then added: “First we create the problem, then we create the reaction, and then we swan in with the solution. Remember we are doing this for your own safety. You are all guilty now and your every move will be surveilled and analysed. Social surveillance websites are already being used against the proles and we want to take your every Thoughtcrime and incriminate you at every juncture of your pathetic lives. Power is not a means; it is an end. One does not establish a dictatorship in order to safeguard a revolution; one makes the revolution in order to establish the dictatorship. The object of persecution is persecution. The object of torture is torture. The object of power is power. We will have total power over the proles and we will utilise every weapon in our arsenal to achieve our goal. It is not enough to own your property, as it is the property of the Party, but we want to own your every thought, including your mind, body and soul. Remember, Sector 1 is not exempt from the revolution.”

The next step after the Snoopers Charter will be RFID chipping for the whole population. For your own safety, of course.

  • Angel Lorenzo

    All government spies on their citizens. It's been going on for centuries. What's the big deal? Tell us something we don't know. Gimme a break like you guys need a snoopers charter for something that's all ready going on? pathetic!

  • Pal Patine

    Every single thinking person including your friend, Benjamin Franklin, is now an enemy of the United Kingdom of Soviet Britain.

  • Clara Dumas

    I am ready to surrender my privacy for a reduction in terrorism and criminality. It is the only logical thing we can do now because we are being attacked by all these terrorists inside our country.
    If we had a snoopers law then Lee Rigby would be alive today and the 7/7 bombings would never have happened. We all need to stop the dissenters trying to stop progress. In World War II we had German spies all over the place and the British people had to be vigilant and watch what they said. We are now in the same situation.

  • red-dawn

    As long as Muslims are made to disappear from the world I'm prepared to accept any laws thrown at me.

  • Freeman

    It's people like you that make me sick. Why don't you just bend over and spread 'em.

  • Matt

    I don't get this what are you idiots going on about? This is for your own security do you not want to be secure in your own country from nutter muslims running around killing innocent people? Do you not want to be secure in your own homes? If you have nothing to hide what is your problem? We're at war right now with radical Islam and if it means more surveillence on everyone so be it. Sign me up! If you do not like it you can go and live in Cambodia or the desert. Hopefully this will cut down illegal immigration and crime so comew one let's have it for the so-called snoopers charter. It's not a snoopers charter but its a protection charter for your citizen rights. This is all I have to say to you non believers.