Speaking on the North Korean state news service (KCNA), Kim Jong Un revealed the truth about the recent surgical operations he has been receiving.
“Comrades, I, myself am now thermo nuclear. I have had two muffugin 500 megaton bombs embedded in my moobs. I will still be your leader, but I warn y’all, if I get angry I may blow. Don’t be tweaking my nips either, those are the damn triggers.”
The North Korean dictator got the idea for the dangerous nuclear mechanical implants after watching a dubbed knock off copy of Iron Man II starring his hero Robert Downey Jr.
Senior North Korean generals however have their doubts about the whole insane situation.
“All it is going to take for the whole frickin mother load to go up is Comrade Kim to shake his moobs in a wild moob shake fest. Then we all go get instantly vapourised. Nigga’s crazy!” General Kim Sung Song told North Korean state news before being shot on the spot for dissent by a special forces unit.