17.7 C
London
Saturday, October 12, 2024
secret satire society
HomeWorldObama: "Why Trump Should Never Have Been President - I Got the...

Obama: “Why Trump Should Never Have Been President – I Got the Tapes”

NEW YORK - USA - Former President of the United States, Barack Obama reveals some espionage tips from when he was president.

“I allegedly bugged Trump Tower while Trump was a candidate for election, and I have to tell ya, he doesn’t deserve to be president, not after what I heard,” former president, Barack Hussein revealed on Tuesday.

Will we ever get to hear those tapes, and if Obama recorded anything untoward, he should reveal the details.

“You call him the Teflon Don. I personally oversaw the bugs and FISA warrant wiretapping operation. The shit I heard, if it was publicised, would make him the Velcro Don!” Obama added.

Obamagate

No one has dared to actually question the legality of what Obama allegedly did by bugging Trump’s phones and home, but questions must one day be answered.

“You ever spent hours and days in a van parked outside Trump Towers? The van smelled of stale coffee, farts, burritos and feet. We could hear a pin drop in his place, and when he sometimes farted near the bugging devices, we thought someone had let off a grenade. All I will tell ya, is that Melania obeys Donald like an Eastern European slave woman. Like he tells her to sit on the floor, twirl on her head then whoop like a dog, and she does it without question. Wish I could do the same with Michael. Then Trump would throw her twenty dollars and tell her to buy a cone. I can’t speak Russian, but we got some serious stuff.”

It seems, despite the threats going back and forth, president Trump is somewhat caught in the headlights and is not acting against his old foe in the face of these spurious claims.

  Daily Squib Book

  DAILY SQUIB BOOK The Perfect Gift or can also be used as a doorstop. Grab a piece of internet political satire history encapsulating 15 years of satirical works. The Daily Squib Anthology REVIEWS: "The author sweats satire from every pore" | "Overall, I was surprised at the wit and inventedness of the Daily Squib Compendium. It's funny, laugh out loud funny" | "Would definitely recommend 10/10" | "This anthology serves up the choicest cuts from a 15-year reign at the top table of Internet lampoonery" | "Every time I pick it up I see something different which is a rarity in any book"
- Advertisment -

NEWS ON THE HOUR

MORE NEWS

THE DAILY SQUIB ANTHOLOGY

The definitive book of Juvenalian satire and uncanny prophesies that somehow came true. This is an anthology encompassing 15 years of Squib satire on the internet compiled and compressed into one tiddly book. Buy the Book Now!