Obama: "Why American Civilians Should Not Be Armed"

WASHINGTON DC - USA - The time has come for Americans to finally grow out of their obsession with firearms, and Obama's second term will ensure that he completes his mission to disarm America and make it into a 'safer' place.

Speaking from the White House East room, president Obama spoke with reporters from numerous media sources telling them about the benefits of a disarmed America.

“The United States is a heavily armed nation. There is no doubt about that, and we all know of its bloody history of how the gun made America into what it is today. I want Americans to understand that there is no need for ordinary citizens to hold firearms anymore. We are not living in the Wild West anymore, we are not under threat anymore, these reasons are why Change has to come. The Second Amendment under my new regime will be superceded by an amendment that will ensure the safety for all Americans against firearms and themselves. How many people die every year from guns in America? Well, I have the statistics right here. In 1998, 30,708 people in the United States died from firearm-related deaths, in 2011, the numbers are shocking, over 75,000 gun related deaths occurred. Now, we saw what happened in Tucson, Arizona with the near fatal gunshot to a Congresswoman. We need to stop people buying guns. It is going to be my mission to stop you owning a deadly gun, because we have a police force to protect you. Fellow citizens, you don’t need guns no more. Look how safe the UK is without guns. Rest assured it will be my mission to protect you from your own guns, and I will not play around in the next term because I will not need to be re-elected then. I am the incumbent candidate this time, and I will be re-elected because nothing sticks to me. They call me ‘Teflon Barry’. You guys don’t have shit on me, I’m magic, I’m invincible and you Repugnants, excuse me, I mean Republicans, can kiss my indignant, perfect, half-caste ass. You’re going to wait in the sidelines for another four years. Just wait and see. What chance do your Mormon and other candidates have?”

The question is, what happens if an American refuses to give up his firearms?