Bob Geldof to Organise Another Fund Raising Concert for Arms Dealers

LONDON - England - Sir Bob Geldof is busy organising another major charity rock concert to stoke up his ego and help rebels in poor African countries buy more weapons.

“I feel like it’s time for me to stoke up my huge f*cking ego again plus the artists’ sales who play in the gig. We’re raising money so that corrupt officials in Africa can siphon off the millions and buy arms as well as villas on Lake Geneva. I’ve heard that since the last two concerts they’re getting a little parched.

“One minister was even on the line to me yesterday telling me that he can’t afford to run his private jet from Eritrea to Lake Lugano anymore, how crazy is that?” Sir Bob told the BBC.

This time, Bob wants to try and approach the concert from a different angle

“Before we were on the ‘Save the World, it’s Christmas Time’ tip. That played on people’s emotions with regards to the Christmas thing, you know how we have all these things and they don’t.

“They gave us sh*t loads of money for that and I became a saint, if only they knew that they were arming rebels with guns to do more killing and buying properties in Europe.

“Look at Africa now, still as poor as sh*te, nothing’s changed eh,” Mr Geldof added sipping his champagne.

Tigrayan People’s Liberation Front

Live Aid alone was enough to fund the Tigrayan People’s Liberation Front (TPLF) with the majority of the $250 million raised by Geldof to overthrow the Ethiopian government.

To many of the rebels, Sir Bob Geldof is a hero who armed them and made it possible for them to live in absolute luxury for the rest of their lives while the people who really needed the money got nothing.

There are other reasons for coming up with another bogus ‘Save the World’ concert — Geldof’s daughter, Peaches.

“You should see the credit card bills mate. It’s like I could feed half of Africa with what she spends my money on in a month as it all goes up her nose. This is a good enough reason for the public to give, because she’s cleaning me out. Please give as much as you can, my wallet is in dire need after my talentless, thick as pig sh*t, runt of a daughter has cleaned me out of everything,” Geldof said sniffing into a dirty handkerchief.

The BBC is currently running a competition on behalf of Sir Bob. What should he call his new concert project to raise more money? Answers in an envelope with a fifty pound note to: Bob’s New Concert Project, PO Box 342, Live Aid Suite 21, London W1 6DA None of the received funds will go towards the concert.

  • Daria

    I hope your happy Bob, I hope you happy for what you done. I gave over £100 to Live Aid. You make me sick you do!


  • Ethiopian Refugee

    Please DON’T give Aid to Ethiopia – Both the then Ethiopian government and the rebels (who are now in power in Ethiopia) spent all that money on weapons purchases from the Soviet Union. Over one million Ethiopians died of starvation because none of the aid money reached them. That was 25 years ago.
    The same thing is also happening in Ethiopia today where the current regime (the former rebels) were given $360 million dollars in U.S. aid and few weeks later they spent the same amount of money on weapons purchase from North Korea despite the arms embargo on North Korea. The Ethiopian regime is using the weapons to carryout genocide in Southern regions of Ethiopia in which the president of Genocide Watch Organization has called it dwarfs the genocide in Darfur, yet despite the fact the U.S. continues to give aid to the

  • Jack

    So Ethiopia are poor and hungry.

    What the fuck happened to all that money bob geldof gave them.

  • peachy plum

    to be fair sir boob did have the best of intentions but was just too naive and stupid to realise that he was getting suckered