Comrade Brown Economic Success Hailed by IMF

LONDON - England - British Soviet Supreme Unelected Commander in Chief, Comrade Gordon Brown, has been hailed by the IMF for his stellar work in bringing forth the New Era of Change and economic Soviet Collectivized Miracle.

Under a blood red sky that seems to signal the Soviet spirit that has gripped our wonderful state under the all-seeing eye of Comrade Brown for the last ten years, there is an assembly of Soviet monetary officials who have travelled from the IMF head office to congratulate Comrade Brown for the Soviet economic miracle he has brought into fruition.

“Unelected leader of the Soviet Britons, Comrade Brown, is a visionary who has put forth his clunking iron fist of supreme control and swept away the reigns of prosperity from amongst the masses. He has taken control of the world by the use of economic ‘silent weapons’ in a form of ‘quiet warfare’, and reduced the economic inductance of the world to a safe level by a process of benevolent slavery and soon to be genocide by releasing new strains of H1N1. Yes, comrades, we have been good at controlling the media, subverting education, and keeping the public distracted with matters of no real importance. The public who have been fooled into believing that government is working for them must never catch on to the real purpose of our New Age of Change, they must never realise until it is too late that they will be stripped of all ownership, property and ultimately life,” Onslow McNamara, a senior IMF agent said as he addressed the assembled officials.

Another senior IMF official had this to say about the issue: “The general public refuses to improve its own mentality and its faith in its fellow man. It has become a herd of proliferating barbarians, and, so’ to speak, a blight upon the fate of the earth. They do not care enough about economic science to learn why they have not been able to avoid war despite religious morality, and their religious or self-gratifying refusal to deal with earthly problems renders the solution of the earthly problem unreachable by them. It is left to those few who are truly willing to think and survive as the fittest to survive, to solve the problem for themselves as the few who really care. Otherwise, exposure of the silent weapon would destroy our only hope of preserving the seed of future true humanity. Comrade Brown has brought forth the ‘Economic shock’ tactics as well as the ‘Greening’ issue which has also been adopted by the ‘chosen one’ in America.”

Comrade Brown then appeared from a big black door behind the podium. He approached the podium with gusto and a morbid grimace: “Comrades, I thank our brothers from the IMF who have seen fit to honour my ‘shock testing’ on the general public. One must realise the importance of this approach in dealing with the proles. The proles might instinctively feel that something is wrong, but because of the technical nature of the silent weapon, they cannot express their feeling in a rational way, or handle the problem with intelligence. Therefore, they do not know how to cry for help, and do not know how to associate with others to defend themselves against it. With our silent weapon, which is applied gradually to the public, the public adjusts/adapts to its presence and learns to tolerate its encroachment on their lives until the pressure (psychological via economic) becomes too great and they crack up. We can see that this is already happening. My control system is the final solution which I have been able to implement after many years of effort. In essence, it is the final solution to all of our problems.”

Comrade Brown was on hand to offer the IMF dignitaries some cabbage delights after the meeting.

Further British Soviet News

Good news comrades. Comrade Brown and local Stasi agents are announcing an increase in listening devices and CCTV surveillance in all sectors starting from tomorrow. Remember that this is for your own protection.

More good news comrades. As of tomorrow, local food monitor officers will enter every household to educate the occupants on how to dispose of food waste properly, how to use state issued eco-bulbs correctly and the correct procedure for conserving energy. Anyone who refuses forced entry into their dwelling will be immediately arrested and detained in an eco-re-education camp for the next forty two years.

Notice: B69761 INGSOCK Long Live the Gord