Here are those amazing Black Friday deals you have been waiting for all year round.
- A hernia – Price Free
- Two broken legs and a broken arm – Yes, but you got a toaster for $2.50
- Crushed ribs and a broken nose – Two for the price of one, a bargain
- Queuing for hours and days so you can get $20 off the price off a TV
- The indignity of being crammed into a doorway with hundreds of other lemmings – Priceless
- Realising the huge mark up that retailers make when you are compelled to buy some reduced throwaway Chinese junk that will break within a week
