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Friday, May 20, 2022
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Blair Converts to Catholicism

LONDON - England - Tony Blair has caused fresh controversy by converting to Roman Catholicism less than six months after leaving office.

Heather Mills to Open Giant Rat Milk Farm in UK

JAKARTA - Indonesia - Eco-warrior Heather Mills McCartney is to open a giant rat milk farm in the UK next year.

The Daily Squib Christmas Nintendo Wii Giveaway

The Daily Squib premier news source is proudly giving away a Nintendo Wii to one lucky recipient. It is still not too late to get a Wii before Christmas so good luck folks.

Entire Labour Government Lost in Iowa

IOWA - United States - The entire Labour Government and Cabinet has been lost in the American state of Iowa. There are no plans to send for a search party as of yet.

Comrade Brown: All Fuel Protests Will be Crushed!

LONDON - England - Recently back from visiting Bolshevik troops in Eurasia and Eastasia, who are fighting on two fronts to increase oil production for the plebiscite and proles. Our supreme unelected Commander in Chief Gordon Brown has warned traitors and treasonous state terrorists against protesting the huge hikes in petrol prices at home.

Dumb Britain

LONDON - England - Britain under Labour has plummeted educationally in the International Education League Table. Is Britain coming close to the education level of the USA?

Supreme Unelected Comrade Brown to Star in Mr. Bean Film

LONDON - England - Comrade Brown, the unelected leader of the Labour one-party system in the Westminster duma, is throwing down the gauntlet to play the role of the bumbling fool and idiot Mr. Bean in a new feature film production funded by Northern Rock and other unnamed sources.

Disks Containing 25 Million Personal Records Found

LONDON - England - The disks containing the valuable information of 25 million child-benefit recipients was found today in a London High Street.

Comrade Brown to Increase Fuel Tax Again

LONDON - England - After increasing fuel duty by 2p in October, supreme unelected comrade, Gordon Brown, is awarding proles another 2p increase in fuel tax as an early festive gift before state holidays in December.

Great Britain to be Renamed Tesco Island

Tescondon - Isle of Tesco - The former country of Britain and numerous cities, towns and counties have all been renamed to reflect the diversity of the United Kingdom of Tesco.

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