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Thursday, July 7, 2022
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Rupert Murdoch Is Not That Important For Whole UK Press to...

LONDON - England - Why should the British press be shut down because of one man's media empire which messed everything up? These are the moral and just questions emanating from some people who still believe in freedom of speech.

Don't Worry Rupert You're Always Welcome at the Squib

LONDON - England - Poor old Mr Rupert Murdoch, he is being ousted from his massive company that he built up all those years ago and sent off to the glue factory. Well, don't worry Rupert, there's always a place for you at the Daily Squib.

Confused Police Arrest Rebekah Brooks Again

CHIPPING NORTON - England - Confused police officers who are more used to receiving brown envelopes stuffed with thousands of pounds from Rebekah Brooks were told to arrest her again yesterday.

Murdoch: "I Have Permanent Amnesia"

WAPPING - England - The son of Rupert Murdoch has been diagnosed with a permanent form of amnesia, doctors working for the murdochs have revealed.

Police to be Armed With Brown Paper Bags

LONDON - England - The Metropolitan Police has got a new weapon in its fight against crime and disorder. The new weapon will be officially unveiled tomorrow by Met Police Commissioner Sir Paul Scribbers.

Rupert Murdoch and Son Taken to Guantanamo Bay

GUANTANAMO BAY - Cuba - The FBI arrested the two men yesterday in a dawn raid and were immediately shipped to the high security detention camp where Islamic terrorists and innocent Afghan goat herders are kept.

News International Staff to Get New Identities

LONDON - England - The Metropolitan Police said today it would offer new identities to the "vast majority" of staff who were employed by Rupert Murdoch at News International.

Rupert Murdoch Cautioned For Reading Whilst Driving

LONDON - England - Media magnate, Rupert Murdoch, has been cautioned by police for driving whilst reading, the Sun newspaper has reported.

Campaign For Rebekah's Law Begins

LONDON - England - After the phone hacking crimes committed by News International were exposed to the world, a new law is going to come into effect by next year, Whitehall bureaucrats have announced.

The News is the News

LONDON - England - Rupert Murdoch was fielding calls from an increasingly embattled Rebekah Brooks this morning as she begged to be kept in the top spot of News International despite the many scandals she has been party to.

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