Quest For the Hobbit Could Cost You Three and a Half Hours of Your Life

LONDON - England - It's that time again when another Lord of the Rings epic film is upon us at the cinemas.

“They’re searching for something that they’re trying to find in some long lost land somewhere and they’ve got to get some people to come up with something then go to another far off land to get help from some creature then embark on another quest that may or may not come to a nearby path that must lead into a tunnel cavern system and don’t forget the golden ring but they must keep searching far and wide, high and low going here and going there with lots of running from those awful brown skinned creatures and going towards a certain point that may change at any point to another point in another place or time. There might be new creatures there, some small ones and some big ones going across the land until the quest for another part of the same quest begins but ends at the same time as the previous quest never started,” Director Peter Jackson describes the first fifteen minutes of the epic Hobbit movie which lasts for an almighty three hours and thirty five minutes.

The cult Lord of the Rings franchise has a massive following all over the world and is bound to make Tolkien fans as well as the British luvvies in the film really happy, and the rest of us really f*cking bored.