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Google Monopoly Denies They Are Monopoly

WASHINGTON D.C. - USA - The Justice Department is seeking the breakup of Google’s monopoly business brokering digital advertising across the entire internet.

“For 15 years we have pursued a course of anticompetitive conduct that has allowed us to halt the rise of rival technologies, manipulate auction mechanics, insulate itself ourselves from competition, and force advertisers and publishers to use our tools,” Google Advertising Chief, Mona Opoli said at a press conference Tuesday. “Our wonderful all encompassing Borg-like monopoly company Google has engaged in exclusionary conduct that has severely weakened and happily destroyed competition in the ad-tech industry, and we are proud of that fact.”

“We are simply not a monopoly and there is nothing you or anyone can do about our monopoly dominance over the entire online ad market,” the Google advertising chief added.

She then stood up and challenged any company to prove that Google was a monopoly.

“We are not a monopoly and I challenge any company that we have bought out or taken over to tell us, the almighty Google monopoly, that we are a monopoly. Ahah! Silence! That’s because there is no one left to suggest we are a monopoly!”

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