Woman Pregnant After TSA Pat-Down

Ms Sanchez is now pregnant after a TSA pat-down

FLORIDA – USA – Eighteen year old Carmella Sanchez has been diagnosed pregnant after a sensual TSA pat-down, that some say went a little too far.

Carmella Sanchez, 18, was travelling from Florida to a nunnery in Boston when she went through the TSA check point.

“I want to dedicate my life to Jesus and this is why I want to go and become a nun. My dreams have now been shattered because I’m pregnant. They took my virginity and that was meant for Jesus alone,” a distraught Sanchez said in tears from a medical facility in the airport.

TSA spokesman, Marvin Haggler, told Fox News: “We had to check for explosives. Maybe one of our screeners got a little too enthusiastic. We’re looking in to getting him a promotion anyway. What you going to do about it? We’re above the law.”

Ms Sanchez was given a lift to her gate and put on another plane after missing her original flight.

  • Elijah Craig

    Generally I find the most amusing reads are the comments.
    How can people believe this is a legitmate news reporting site?
    Look up SATIRE in your dictionaries folks.

  • Bill

    I heard they are planning abortion kiosks to offset these pesky fertility issues.

  • Joanne Croswell

    If you read this my dear Carmella don’t despair. If Jesus is in your heart he will always be there whatever happens. These TSA animals need to take a long walk off a short pier. When our nation makes being a Christian a crime like the godless people in the government are doing right now, this is what happens they abuse us!

  • Koop

    Maybe it was a divine intervention and not the TSA guy. Hang on a second, isn’t this kinda the time we get the second coming of Christ?

  • WTF?

    How’s this possible? They had sex or did he have something on his glove?

  • Katie

    We had to check for explosives. Maybe one of our screeners got a little too enthusiastic. We’re looking in to getting him a promotion anyway. What you going to do about it? We’re above the law.

    What an asshole!!!!

  • do not be afraid my child

    Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.
    Deuteronomy 31:6

  • Lucy Colman

    I read this story and I cried. The poor girl must have been so alone and her dreams are now shattered. How is she going to support the child. Seriously she should get child support from the father and if he runs then prosecute him. This is why Our society is all broke up because of men like that TSA guy. Hope he rots in hell for what he did to this poor girl.

  • Jon

    Scumbag TSA !

  • Tamara

    How awful…..I hope they catch that SOB and cut his balls off.

  • Jenny Ruger

    I think the TSA needs a new spkesman.
    I mean what kind of an answer is that?
    Has the world gone mad, how are these people allowed to operate with such blatant disregard for human rights?

  • Shani

    That poor girl I can’t beleive that this happened to her. Isn’t this classed as rape? OMG I’m disgusted.