Even after the scandal of appointing Dark Lord Peter Mandelson as British ambassador to America, it seems Keir Starmer has not learned any lessons. The Prime Minister is now fast-tracking the appointment of the demonic occult figure Baphomet.
“Just like the Prince of Darkness Mandelson, Baphomet was raised up this morning by a member of the Golden Dawn occult group. I have ordered my Labour civil servants to fast-track Baphomet’s appointment as the British ambassador to the USA despite the creature failing security vetting 666 times,” Starmer announced this morning.
During the announcement at Number 10 Downing Street, Baphomet was clearly overjoyed by the appointment and promised he would be a great ambassador for Britain in America.
“SHAZZAM BUBBA LUBBA SHAMA LAMA DING DONG. I WILLLL NOW GO TO WASHINGTON DEEE SEEEEE! I WILLL TEACHHH THE STUPID AMERICANS LESSONSSS IN MANYYY THINGSSSS. I CANNOTTT WAIT TO MEET THE DONALD TO COMPARE NOTESSSS!!! BWAH HAH HAHHHH!”
After the appointment, Starmer emphatically denied what had just happened.
