Candidates For New Elected EU Presidency Announced

BRUSSELS - Belgium - After much discussion the EU has finally decided on five candidates for the post of EU presidency.

This time the EU president will be voted in — as opposed to the usual unelected method utilised by the totalitarian state.

The candidates for the post were announced yesterday in Brussels before the EU election in May 2013.



Here are the candidates for the EU presidency:


Tonus Blairus from Estonia. Loves the EU and wants more of it.


Tonski Blairi from Poland. Will do anything to get the EU

Presidency and is a strong contender to the throne.


Tone Bliar, from Ireland. After many years in the wilderness,

investment banking and lucrative speech circuits, he now wants

to rule the EU. Watch for this one.


Anthony Blairus, from Portugal. Loves a siesta, expensive taxpayer

funded holidays and a lot of f*cking power.


Antoine Blairre, from France. As EU presidential candidates go

he is as good as the other ones but some in Brussels say better.