Did England Just Win 2-0 Against Germany?

WEMBLEY - England - According to our unbelieving eyeballs, it seems that England just scored two goals to nil against Germany.

Amongst the chaos of beer cans and crumpled takeaway wrappers we’re wondering if we just saw what we saw at the Squib HQ? England just whacked Germany 2 fucking nil! Is this some kind of peyote mescaline dream laced with LSD in a supernova multicoloured desert with Panzerschrecks going off in unison to the tune of Three Blind Mice?

In what has been an insipid and totally boring Euro tournament, England finally pulled off a total stonker, first with the amazing run and finish of Raheem Sterling, then adding a cherry on top of the cake with an astonishing pass by Grealish onto Kane slamming it into goal with his forehead past Neuer’s outstretched arms.

The look of absolute disbelief on the faces of the German players told a story and a half.

Naturally the Wembley crowd of 45,000 non-social distanced crowd went berzerk as the final whistle blew after 4 minutes of extra time volleying.

There is no doubt that Brexit has been good for the country, as England is now flourishing with a new found confidence never seen whilst under EU rule.

What will Saturday’s match against Ukraine bring for England?