After reviewing the wonderful Jeremy Corbyn Annual 2018 we were confronted this time by a troop of U.S. secret servicemen all wearing the same suits, the same haircuts, and same dark glasses.
One of them stepped forward, looked left, then right, and slapped a brown envelope into our reviewer’s face.
“Review this book. It better get an A+ or (wipes finger across his neck whilst smiling).”
Looking up, they were all gone, vamoos, vanished. The Unofficial Donald Trump Annual 2019, published by Pavilion Books, written by Adam G. Goodwin, Dicken Goodwin, and Jonathan Parkyn was now in our weary hands.
Flicking through this annual, one advises the reader to have a pen, and scissors handy, because you’re going to have a lorra lorra fun cutting out masks and such.
The exercises and puzzles within the book will no doubt bring joy and happiness to the whole family, with cut-outs of Kim Jong-un and styling tips to get that perfect Donald hair-do, and a whole section dedicated to fake news.
Trumpaholics will love the dreamy Donald pin-ups and pictures, they can cut out and add to their van’s exterior whilst planning their next failed excursion against those dastardly Dems. We of course say this all in jest and do not advise anyone to even think about it.
The Teflon Don, as we like to call him, can have a bucket of shit poured over his head, yet still come away untouched and smelling of roses. Such is his propensity to weather any Stormy storm dispatched against him by those fake news peddling stinking socialist Dems and crooked lawyers.
In honour of the orange one, why not get a piece of orange and pour some melted chocolate over it, or build a wall of waffles 12 feet high with maple syrup as the cement? If you eat that load and do not projectile vomit over your cat, all the better for you, at least the migrant caravan could not get across the border.
Just buy the Donald Trump Annual 2019 and stick it in the Christmas stocking, will ya? You and the family will not be disappointed with hours of entertainment and vomitous sticky fun.