17.7 C
Wednesday, May 22, 2024
secret satire society
HomeWorldWho's Next on the Obama Assassination List?

Who's Next on the Obama Assassination List?

WASHINGTON DC - USA - President Obama is working on his next assassination to boost his polling numbers for the coming up election, his campaign manager, Joel Scheinwert, has told ABC.

The Obama administration is speeding up the process for worldwide assassinations specifically to boost his chances of re-election in 2012, the White House has announced.

“Obama is personally overseeing the assassinations in his situation room where he can direct the Seals or Marines into action. He tells them who to shoot and how they should do it,” Freddy Kocnich, a White House aide revealed on Thursday.

Major targets at the moment are obviously headed by Colonel Gaddafi, but the U.S. has a number of other key players around the world who could do some serious boosting to Obama’s re-election.

“We wouldn’t mind getting the guy in Pakistan and taking that place over, but they got nukes. Syria’s Assad is another one but their Russian friends are too close and could get dangerous. Ahmedinnajacket is up there, but those pesky Iranians have nukes now too. China’s too big. Obama’s got something against Britain because they tortured Kenyans all those years ago. Unfortunately for him, Britain is meant to be a key player in NATO and an ally to the U.S. so no go there. Jeez, if only he could bump off that Sarah Palin, or Trump?” Mr Kocnich said.

  Daily Squib Book

  DAILY SQUIB BOOK The Perfect Gift or can also be used as a doorstop. Grab a piece of internet political satire history encapsulating 15 years of satirical works. The Daily Squib Anthology REVIEWS: "The author sweats satire from every pore" | "Overall, I was surprised at the wit and inventedness of the Daily Squib Compendium. It's funny, laugh out loud funny" | "Would definitely recommend 10/10" | "This anthology serves up the choicest cuts from a 15-year reign at the top table of Internet lampoonery" | "Every time I pick it up I see something different which is a rarity in any book"


Comments are closed.

- Advertisment -





The definitive book of Juvenalian satire and uncanny prophesies that somehow came true. This is an anthology encompassing 15 years of Squib satire on the internet compiled and compressed into one tiddly book. Buy the Book Now!

Translate »