Comrade Brown Congratulates Haringey Council

LONDON - England - Supreme 'unelected' leader, Comrade Brown and Commissar for Children's Brainwashing and Re-Education, Ed Balls have congratulated Haringey Council (Sector 41) on upholding the Labour Vision of Change during the Five Year Plan New Era of Brown-ism espoused by our supreme unelected leader last year.

Our supreme leader Comrade Brown was on hand today to show his Soviet appreciation of all Labour comrades working for Haringey council, especially the social workers who have made such an effort in protecting the children of the sector.

“Comrades, after having supped a mighty Soviet meal of cabbage soup and cabbage cake this afternoon with high ranking social service bureaucrats who are paid huge sums of taxpayers money to sit on their arses and do f*ck all, I am pleased to see the progress that is being made in this sector. My role as chief architect for the New Era of Change is something I take with great pride and this is why I would like to announce a hefty increase in surveillance cameras within this sector to monitor all prole activity and yet never solve any crimes, I have also ordered Commissar Ed Balls to applaud the many cases of incompetence, stupidity, gross negligence and utter waste of resources and time as is employed by the Haringey Social services. They have shown the Labour ideal of looking like you’re working and yet doing nothing. Yes comrades, this is what we must do. We must look like we are doing something for the proles, it’s really that easy.”

Labour’s wonderful legacy can be seen in the many upstanding achievements gained throughout their long reign as Bolshevik commanders and leaders of the workers struggle.

Haringey council’s Social Services Department is the flagship of Labour’s legacy, it epitomises the strength of Gordon Brown our supreme unelected leader, it symbolises the Labour ethos of “Spin Spin Spin and do F*ck-ing Noth-ing”. It symbolises the Labour ethos of cronyism and disregard of any form common sense. It symbolises the fact that madness is now the normal mode of operation in a crumbling system of buck passing where no one is ever held accountable.

Out across the Soviet state of Comrade Brown’s Britain, a grey land of no colour, dull, bloated and yet strangely emaciated, a chill wind is blowing. Nothing can temper the storm of illness that pervades this dark and dank torture hole, not even the millions of cctv cameras that invade everyone’s soul every day, not even the constant nanny-state baloney that is booted into our ear holes every day and yet nothing is done, not even the insane tax levels that have left the people destitute and moribund. There is no cure for the thousands of tortured children left to rot in Haringey council or the thousands across the country. All there is, is Comrade Brown and his voice on the televisual propaganda box, him and his officers of doom roughly farting their brussel sprout gas from their cake holes as they vomit the daily bulletin of lies out yet again.