17.7 C
London
Tuesday, June 18, 2024
secret satire society
HomeWorldToyota Sat Navs Pray For Passengers

Toyota Sat Navs Pray For Passengers

LONDON - England - The Toyota car company has showcased their latest satellite navigation box featuring a voice that prays for it's passengers whilst they're hurtling to certain death at high speed.

The new Toyota sat nav system is the only one in the world which says a final prayer for its passengers before they crash, the Top Gear TV show has revealed.

One of the presenters for the popular motoring program, Richard Hammond, recently tried out the Toyota sat nav system and gave it a resounding nod.

Speaking from his hospital bed he said: “This is my third near fatal crash filming the Top Gear program, and I have to say this new Toyota sat nav system really did ease the terror of hurtling towards a concrete bollard at 140 mph in my Yaris. It calmly gave me the last rites in a very calm voice just before the crash which paralysed me from the neck down. I definitely would buy this if I could ever drive a car again.”

The prayer said by the sat nav system installed in all Toyota cars is delivered by a practising vicar, although depending on religious proclivities, the prayer can be adjusted to Islamic, Hindu, Jewish and even Church of England faiths.

A spokesman for Toyota said: “Our customers like the peace of mind they have when they get into one of our cars. The moment you step on the accelerator pedal you know that you’re in God’s hands. This is when the sat nav prayer starts reciting the last words you will ever hear. Who needs Dignitas when you have a Toyota.”

  Daily Squib Book

  DAILY SQUIB BOOK The Perfect Gift or can also be used as a doorstop. Grab a piece of internet political satire history encapsulating 15 years of satirical works. The Daily Squib Anthology REVIEWS: "The author sweats satire from every pore" | "Overall, I was surprised at the wit and inventedness of the Daily Squib Compendium. It's funny, laugh out loud funny" | "Would definitely recommend 10/10" | "This anthology serves up the choicest cuts from a 15-year reign at the top table of Internet lampoonery" | "Every time I pick it up I see something different which is a rarity in any book"

1 COMMENT

Comments are closed.

- Advertisment -

NEWS ON THE HOUR

curtis-press
curtis-press
curtis-press
curtis-press

MORE NEWS

THE DAILY SQUIB ANTHOLOGY

The definitive book of Juvenalian satire and uncanny prophesies that somehow came true. This is an anthology encompassing 15 years of Squib satire on the internet compiled and compressed into one tiddly book. Buy the Book Now!

Translate »