Foot in Mouth Disease Returns to UK

SURREY - England - John Prescott has decided to return to Britain after a long absence of putting his foot in it. This time he is eager to piss more people off than he has already done previously.

The nightmare ‘foot in mouth’ of John Prescott returned to Britain last night,
forcing Gordon Brown to cut short his holiday after only a few hours in
Devon to chair a crisis meeting of Cobra, the emergency planning unit in
Downing Street today.

Mr Prescott who has cost the British taxpayer millions of pounds in expenses and luxuries arrived at Heathrow aboard a Texan Business mans private jet intent on sucking dry more taxpayer cash.

Taxpayers were hit with a £500,000 bill from John Prescott’s office for
travel and hospitality last year, official figures reveal.

They show that even after Mr Prescott was stripped of his
departmental role as Deputy Prime Minister, the public were still
paying hundreds of thousands of pounds towards his and his staff’s
globe-trotting and first class debauchery.

Mr Prescott has also still not moved out of his grace-and-favour flat in Admiralty House in Whitehall.

The travel, subsistence and hospitality bill for the Deputy
Prime Minister’s Office was £507,000 in 2006/07, with overall office
costs being £2.5 million.

This financial year, Mr Prescott embarked on a “farewell tour” of the world, embarking on a tour encompassing 23 countries all in first class and the final bill footed by the tax payer.

A Treasury Minister commented: “John has done nothing wrong, as long as he is a Minister for the Labour party he is allowed a blank cheque.”

“It is better that this large sum of taxpayers money goes to luxury travel and first class food consumed by Prescott, there are enough funds to pay nurses and hospital staff, those workers should not be greedy now,” a Labour official speaking to the Squib on condition of anonymity said yesterday.

During his tenure as Deputy Prime Minister, Prescott did not contribute to anything apart from putting his ‘foot in his mouth’ and spending huge sums of tax payers money on his corrupt indulgent gluttony and greed.