Fresh in from some Hollywood insider on Substack, the latest news about Meghan Markle’s film career is here. After being dumped from the Guy Ritchie Netflix series, producers of the show have revealed that Markle has been replaced by a 2×4 plank of wood.
Plank
“It’s the same thing but a lot cheaper. We went to B&Q and picked out a plank of wood for £15. It possesses the exact acting skills as Meghan Markle,”
Woodworm
Guy Ritchie may be a poor man’s version of Quentin Tarantino, but the dumping of Meghan Markle has made his status rise amongst many.
“The backlash was too strong and would have killed the series dead in its tracks to have her in the series. Her replacement, the plank of wood, also serves as a great table when propped on some chairs for the studio crew to eat their lunch,” another producer revealed.
What’s next for Meghan Markle now? Perhaps Corrie, Eastenders or maybe some daytime DIY show where she can be as interesting as a ceiling joist.
