Commissar Burnham Cums On Stage After Politburo Election Win

Commissar Burnham, who vows to go so far left he will fall off the map of communist/Marxist leftism, has won the Makerfield by-election. After being named as the winner against the brigand groups of right-wing fascists, he visibly ejaculated on stage.

A BBC reporter on the scene received a few splashes of fluid on her face as she was relatively close to Burnham. Some observers compared Commissar Burnham’s facial expression during his happy moment to that of former conservative chancellor George Osborne and his many cum faces.

“The results were announced, and we heard Burnham go ‘whoah, whoah, whoo-o-o-o-o-ah!’ and he splashed everywhere. I think he was rather happy to have won,” Katie Phuackrick, a BBC reporter, recalled.

One man who was not cumming was Comrade Starmer, who is still in his bunker at a secret location. He will soon be ousted and made into Net Zero Juice.

The transition from socialism to communism is now on track.