Serial Bully Bercow Bullies Independent Watchdog Investigating His Bullying

LONDON - England - Serial bully Bercow has denied he bullied anyone in parliament by beating the crap out of the independent investigators.

Grabbing one of the investigators by the neck, former Speaker of the House, John Bercow insisted he was not a “fucking bully”. He then smashed the investigator’s head into the desk, causing the man to cry like a wounded animal as large globules of blood splattered from his broken nose. Serial bully Bercow insists he is not a bully.

“I am NOT a bully, you snivelling inquisitive rotter. Now take what you said back before I smash your little face in even more!” Bercow yelled at the top of his Speaker’s voice.

Order, Order!

“How dare you insinuate that I bullied people when I was in parliament. Where are these people making these accusations? Give me that piece of paper now. Does it have their names and addresses? I am going to kick the living shit out of them. Bastards!”

Of course, it was those duplicitous Remainers in parliament, trying to overturn the EU Referendum result, who fully tolerated Bercow’s incessant bullying.

“I’ve got two black eyes, a broken leg and Bercow gave me a wedgie, but I support him fully because I’m a Remainer,” one Remainer said before being carted off.

Despite all the damning evidence, Bercow still pleads his innocence.

“I’m not a fucking bully, and if anyone says otherwise, I will break their legs and arms.”

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