Entertainment

Please Spend Your Money Needlessly On Black Fraud Day

LONDON - England - An urgent message to all mindless consumers. Please spend all your money on Black Fraud Day.

Yes, you need to spend your money on supposedly “cheap” Chinese tat on Black Fraud Day, an annual tradition exported to the world by the Americans.

End of year stock clearance of useless junk 

We’re here to convince you that the fucking deals you are coerced to buy are a fantastic opportunity to spend all of your money on Black Fraud Day. Get your credit card out and do not think as you buy another piece of utter crap that will either break in a few weeks time or be obsolete in less than that time.

In rip off Britain, consumers are treated with such disdain and contempt with overpriced products compared to the rest of the world that a simple tiny reduction in price is seen as a massive fucking deal, when in reality it is still more expensive than anywhere else.

Imagine the throbbing veins on Jeff Bozo’s bald head as he watches the sales figures and his offshore bank balance reach new fucking heights. Bozo is so happy that you are spending all your money on things you do not need, he is so ecstatic he ejaculates over one of his multiple screen set-ups.

Most of the so-called deals are not actually deals, but you don’t know that, thankfully for the companies selling you utter shit. If you were to do your due diligence and research the prices, you would realise that, but no, you have been dazzled momentarily, and you have to get that Black Fraud Day deal.

Anyway, here’s to the Wonderful Black Fraud Day — empty your wallets you fucking chumps, you truly deserve everything you get.

 

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