Grim Reaper Dies Before Keith Richards

“He was waiting for way too long for this Keith Richards fella to pass on but it just didn’t happen. It was only last week that Mr. Death caught a cold and it got worse. He just deteriorated, and sadly he passed away last night. He’s going to be sorely missed,” one of the angel of death’s friends, told Hell Weekly.

No one knows who is going to take over the role of the ten thousand year old entity, but there are suggestions that when Richards finally croaks, possibly in the next millennium or so, the legendary Rolling Stone himself could take over the role.

“Yeah sure, we need someone like Keith Richards. I’ve seen a picture of him and he looks like death already. I think he’ll fit into the position just right,” Satan told Rupert Murdoch’s Fox news network this morning.