‘Comedian’ Bill Bailey Stolen From Liverpool

LIVERPOOL - England - It's not only the designated city of culture but a magical city as well, that's why everything goes missing, including comedian, Bill Bailey.

Scousers will steal anything and this time they’ve gone too far, they have seen fit to steal small-time comedian Bill Bailey, a regular slot on self serving cronyistic bottom-sniffing BBC ‘comedy’ shows.

No one knows his whereabouts and the police can’t be bothered to search for the comedian because so much stuff goes missing in Liverpool anyway and this is at the end of the list.

Police Constable Nick Louser, for the Liverpool Constabulary was adamant that the comedian was somewhere within the continent of Europe by now or possibly Africa.

“In Liverpool, if it’s not tied down with a thick steel chain, it’s gone in sixty seconds. Last week scousers stole the tires off all our police cars, resprayed the vehicles, and sold off all our cop cars to the Romanian police force while we were still in them.”

If anyone has any information about anything…..

Do you value freedom?

SUPPORT THE DAILY SQUIB We fight for freedom, justice, satire and coffee.
  • First they came for the Satirists
  • And I did not speak out
  • Then they came for the...
  • Disqus Comments Loading...
    Share
    Published by
    Tags: celebrityuk

    Recent Posts

    CONFESSION – Lord Mandy: “How I was played like a fiddle by a Russian spy”

    LONDON - England - Former comrade Lord Mandy has made a confession about his crimes…

    5 hours ago

    “Comrades, here’s a small list of current business closures due to my policies”

    SCUNTHORPE - England - Commissar Rachel Reeves is proud of her record for economic "growth"…

    12 hours ago

    Homeless Fergie Found Under Waterloo Bridge

    LONDON - England - Yes, you guessed correctly. It's under Waterloo Bridge for the former…

    3 days ago

    Prince Andrew: “Why is it just the Brits in the Epstein files?”

    DUBAI - UAE - Prince Andrew decries why the Epstein files mainly focus on the…

    3 days ago

    Why I had to dump the “Jonah” Commissar Reeves from the China begging trip

    BEIJING - China - Comrade Starmer explains why he dumped "Jonah" Commissar Reeves from the…

    4 days ago

    Comrade Starmer Visiting Communist Comrades in China

    BEIJING - China - Comrade Starmer is on a visit to the communist country as…

    6 days ago

    This website uses cookies.