Europe Prepared For Sharia Law

BRUSSELS - Belgium - The European Union is committed to integration of Sharia law under Islamic teachings, and is preparing the public for major changes due to the mass migration from the Middle East.

The world is changing at breakneck speed and so are the laws governing the EU.

European technocrats are preparing the continent for Sharia law as the pace of migrants from the Middle East and Africa increases daily.

Speaking from Brussels, Jens Toldtars, an EU official revealed that many things will have to change as Europe accepts millions of new people.

“Women will have to be more modest in their attire as showing any skin is strictly haram, there will not be any alcohol and Fridays will be the time of prayer as the Muezzins make their calls to visit the mosques. These are just the small things that will change. No more pork, ham or sausages, this order may be hard for the Germans, but they will get used to it, especially as the punishment for not adhering to these laws is being beaten or stoned. Adulterers will be stoned, thieves will have their hands chopped off and we are currently discussing how to go ahead with beheading, we may re-introduce the guillotine as it is a far more efficient, less messy way of conducting executions.”

Under Islamic law men are allowed to have up to twenty wives each, and women are not allowed to drive vehicles under some severe regimes like Saudi Arabia. As of yet, the EU is under consultation with Islamic scholars on how best to implement the new laws.

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