Starmer’s Rickshaw Crashes On Way to PMQs

Keir Starmer had a close call yesterday whilst making his way to PMQs in an overcrowded rickshaw.

According to reports from the Evening Standard, the rickshaw driver was swerving all over the road near Trafalgar Square en route to the Houses of Parliament when there was a brief altercation with a herd of cows, some goats, and a one-legged blind beggar on crutches.

The rickshaw hit the blind man at the zebra crossing but continued on without stopping.

Witnesses say that the PM was holding on for dear life as the rickshaw with 8 occupants swerved erratically to avoid various large potholes, farm animals, and pedestrians crossing the road.

Arguwal Banarjee, from Wood Green, was not happy with the situation.

“You would think the Prime Minister of Great Britain would know better. Blimey! He should not be travelling in one of those rickshaws in the first place. Those drivers are paagal! The streets are looking like a third-world country or something like that! It’s a bloody, blimey disgrace, sahib!”