The Rats of Parliament

Who would have thought, parliament is full of rats. Whilst Conservative leader Kemi Badenoch was giving another one of her righteous speeches, a rat scurried by behind her. This time, it wasn’t a politician unfortunately but a real fucking rat. The Palace of Westminster is completely inundated with rodents inside its crumbling facade.

The problem is so huge, every year a large sum of taxpayer’s money is spent trying to control the rats infesting the place, and we’re not just talking about the Independent Parliamentary Standards Authority here either, inspecting ministerial expenses.

UK Parliament pest control costs (financial years ending March, total for estate):

2015: £110,359
2016: £103,158
2017: £132,619
2018: £119,424
2019: £111,498
2020: £149,339
2021: £109,563
2022: £122,363
2023: £126,162
2024: £136,231

Total (2015-2024): £1,220,715

Forecast 2025 (linear trend): £133,767

Source: Official Parliament docs & reports.