Donald Trump Could be the Next Pope

VATICAN CITY - Rome - Donald Trump is considering becoming the new pope after the sad passing of Pope Francis yesterday.

The White House has announced that Donald J. Trump is considering becoming the next Pope of the Catholic Church after Pope Francis sadly passed away yesterday.

The Holy See in the Vatican received the news just a few hours ago, and the 120 cardinals who are debating if Trump should be the new Pope are still in their closed meeting.

Cardinal Barry Biden of Delaware made some encouraging comments regarding Trump’s ascendancy to sainthood as the new pontiff.

“Ice cream! Ice cream! Crack pipe! Hunter! Burisma! 10 percent! Big guy! Orange! Hmmmm, yucka, yucka, ding-dong!”

Here’s to the next Pope — Donald Trump.

Story developing …

 

ADVERTISE ON THE DAILY SQUIB

Email advertising (at) dailysquib.co.uk for all your advertising needs.
  • SUPPORT THE DAILY SQUIB
  • We fight for freedom, justice, satire, and coffee.
  • Disqus Comments Loading...
    Share
    Published by
    Tags: popetrump

    Recent Posts

    “I WILL CARRY ON! CHAOS! I WILL CARRY ON! CHAOS! CHAOSSSSS!”

    PLANET SCUNTHORPE - KEIR DAVROS HAS MADE A DEFIANT SPEECH IN DEFENCE OF HIS RULE.

    11 hours ago

    Artificial Intelligence Emerging as a Key Competitive Advantage in Cybersecurity, New Report Finds

    GENEVA - Switzerland - Artificial intelligence is transforming the cybersecurity landscape at an unprecedented pace…

    2 days ago

    Comical Starmer Reassures Labour Party After Election Drubbing

    SCUNTHORPE - England - Comical Starmer has reassured Labour Party members that everything is okay…

    4 days ago

    LOCAL ELECTION RESULTS: “Comrades, everything is okay. Nothing has changed!”

    SCUNTHORPE - England - Comrade Starmer is defiant despite massive Labour Party losses with the…

    4 days ago

    VOTE LABOUR: “Comrades, today I am ordering you to vote for Labour”

    SCUNTHORPE - England - Supreme Comrade Starmer is ordering all citizens of the People's Republic…

    5 days ago

    We’re Giving Away 1,000 FREE Tickets on an EXCLUSIVE Hantavirus Cruise

    SOUTHAMPTON - England - The Daily Squib is giving away 1,000 free tickets on an…

    1 week ago

    This website uses cookies.