Heathrow Airport Powered by Two AA Batteries

LONDON - England - Heathrow Airport is powered by two AA batteries, the owners of the airport have revealed.

Imagine that, whoever bought Heathrow Airport received two AA batteries in the package as well.

If you look on the back of the box, it also reveals that Heathrow Airport was Made in China.

The batteries on the airport don’t last long though, according to users, so they have to be replaced many times during the day. According to engineers examining the power system after a recent power outage, the two AA batteries only last 30 seconds before having to be replaced.

“We’ve hired a man to do the battery replacing. He is very good at it. He used to be employed by Katie Price to replace the batteries for her vibrators. You can imagine how many she went through in a day,” the Heathrow Airport manager, Pelane Kerash, told newspapers on Friday.

In a Net Zero push, Ed Miliband, the Energy Secretary, has suggested that the batteries are scrapped in the future by 2050 and a man or woman would ride a bicycle with a belt around the wheel to produce electricity through a generator, which converts mechanical energy into electrical energy. This would involve the person riding the bicycle 24-hours a day, 365 days a year, without any breaks.

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