Daily Squib ESG Rating Reported at -6500

If you don’t know what the ESG agency is and their woke communist agenda is, where have you been all this time? The environmental, social and governance agency, are an anti-capitalist organisation that seeks to ruin the global economy and bring forth a Marxist communist system where everyone is impoverished apart from the communist hierarchy.

Touted by the likes of the WEF and the Soros commie commissars who are dictating many things these days, the ESG agency is manned by woke social justice activists, hardline communists and militant Marxists.

“Our role within the financial and economic framework is to destroy companies pandering to our ratings. For example, the Bud Light transgender Dylan Mulvaney did an excellent job in destroying the business of Anheuser-Busch, he single-handedly lost the company over $70 billion in market capital, and he has completely tainted the Bud Light brand in America forever, however for this great work we give Anheuser-Busch and ESG rating of 98. If they go completely bankrupt, their score will be 100,” an ESG agent revealed to CNN on Thursday.

Other wokified companies like Nike, Starbucks and Buzzfeed, all adhere to solid ESG ratings by disseminating the communist ideology throughout the former capitalist Western economy.

“ESG was essentially created by China. We saw how they could blend hardline communism with solid capitalism controlled by a totalitarian, brutal dictatorship. Essentially, ESG has been given the role of moulding Western companies to the communist framework of China and the CCP, along with its staunch Maoist brand of communism. The West is thus aligning with China, and this is our ultimate goal,” chief commissar Brian Blofeld of ESG’s New York HQ told the New York Times.

The future looks so bright, I gotta wear shades…