Iran Promises to Not Build Any Nuclear Weapons While Building New Nuclear Weapons

DETROIT - USA - A historic agreement on Iran's nuclear programme to keep on building new nuclear weapons was made possible by months of unprecedented secret meetings between US and Iranian officials, in further signs of the accelerating nuclear capabilities of Iran, it emerged on Sunday.

“Hands on heart, we promise not to build any nuclear weapons whilst building the nuclear weapons we’re building right now. You can have our assurance that the newer nuclear weapons we are building are not the older nuclear weapons we have postponed building but will still build anyway,” Mohammad Javad Zarif, Iran’s foreign affairs minister told John Kerry’s toupee during another nuclear meeting at a Holiday Inn in downtown Detroit yesterday.

According to Israel’s premier, Benjamin Netanyahu, the Iranians are definitely building more nuclear weapons and for once he’s right, they actually are.

Looks like the world is a safer place now so we can all rest assured that we all won’t get blown to smithereens in a nuclear holocaust…Aaaargh!!!!!

ADVERTISE ON THE DAILY SQUIB

Email advertising (at) dailysquib.co.uk for all your advertising needs.
  • SUPPORT THE DAILY SQUIB
  • We fight for freedom, justice, satire, and coffee.
  • Disqus Comments Loading...
    Share
    Published by
    Tags: israeluswar

    Recent Posts

    “I WILL CARRY ON! CHAOS! I WILL CARRY ON! CHAOS! CHAOSSSSS!”

    PLANET SCUNTHORPE - KEIR DAVROS HAS MADE A DEFIANT SPEECH IN DEFENCE OF HIS RULE.

    18 hours ago

    Artificial Intelligence Emerging as a Key Competitive Advantage in Cybersecurity, New Report Finds

    GENEVA - Switzerland - Artificial intelligence is transforming the cybersecurity landscape at an unprecedented pace…

    3 days ago

    Comical Starmer Reassures Labour Party After Election Drubbing

    SCUNTHORPE - England - Comical Starmer has reassured Labour Party members that everything is okay…

    4 days ago

    LOCAL ELECTION RESULTS: “Comrades, everything is okay. Nothing has changed!”

    SCUNTHORPE - England - Comrade Starmer is defiant despite massive Labour Party losses with the…

    5 days ago

    VOTE LABOUR: “Comrades, today I am ordering you to vote for Labour”

    SCUNTHORPE - England - Supreme Comrade Starmer is ordering all citizens of the People's Republic…

    6 days ago

    We’re Giving Away 1,000 FREE Tickets on an EXCLUSIVE Hantavirus Cruise

    SOUTHAMPTON - England - The Daily Squib is giving away 1,000 free tickets on an…

    1 week ago

    This website uses cookies.