Doubleplus Woke Announcement: Chocorat Increase by 25 grams

Woke Directive 37634-c chocorat increase announcement by Inner Party and Woke Web Monopoly Ministry.

Woke comrades, commissars, Bolsheviks, workers and proles.

Increase in Chocorat Woke Directive 37634-c was announced today via Big Brother in Silicon Valley.

The Great Reset Initiative in conjunction with the Inner Party will increase the chocorat to 25 grams this week.

Unpersons will not be permitted the chocorat increase but instead will be vaporised after submitting to a session of two-minute hate on the monopoly Social Thinkpol Network.

Due to the significance of the chocorat announcement, anyone seen committing thoughtcrime by the Thinkpol will be vapourised.

Hail Woke Brother.

ADVERTISE ON THE DAILY SQUIB

Email advertising (at) dailysquib.co.uk for all your advertising needs.
  • SUPPORT THE DAILY SQUIB
  • We fight for freedom, justice, satire, and coffee.
  • Disqus Comments Loading...
    Share
    Published by

    Recent Posts

    “I WILL CARRY ON! CHAOS! I WILL CARRY ON! CHAOS! CHAOSSSSS!”

    PLANET SCUNTHORPE - KEIR DAVROS HAS MADE A DEFIANT SPEECH IN DEFENCE OF HIS RULE.

    17 hours ago

    Artificial Intelligence Emerging as a Key Competitive Advantage in Cybersecurity, New Report Finds

    GENEVA - Switzerland - Artificial intelligence is transforming the cybersecurity landscape at an unprecedented pace…

    3 days ago

    Comical Starmer Reassures Labour Party After Election Drubbing

    SCUNTHORPE - England - Comical Starmer has reassured Labour Party members that everything is okay…

    4 days ago

    LOCAL ELECTION RESULTS: “Comrades, everything is okay. Nothing has changed!”

    SCUNTHORPE - England - Comrade Starmer is defiant despite massive Labour Party losses with the…

    5 days ago

    VOTE LABOUR: “Comrades, today I am ordering you to vote for Labour”

    SCUNTHORPE - England - Supreme Comrade Starmer is ordering all citizens of the People's Republic…

    6 days ago

    We’re Giving Away 1,000 FREE Tickets on an EXCLUSIVE Hantavirus Cruise

    SOUTHAMPTON - England - The Daily Squib is giving away 1,000 free tickets on an…

    1 week ago

    This website uses cookies.