Oh Dear, Two Months of Rain Every Day For Rest of Year

LONDON - England - According to the Met Office, Britain's going to have two months of rain per day for the rest of the year.

“Sometimes we might get three months of rain in one day, or maybe four,” BBC weatherman Michael Haddock, said on the BBC news today.

If there is one months rain on one day, and three months of rain on another day, it is quite conceivable that there can be five months of rain on all days of the week.

“You may start off with one month of rain falling within the first fifteen minutes of the day, that then tapers off bringing six months of rain in the space of twenty five minutes on the next day, and then it’s an additional eight months of rain if you add on the next day’s rainfall, then average it off to the median number. If we add on the next month’s figures after all the daily months of rain have fallen we get a new figure for months of rain. That slowly increases by two or three monthly rain increments or whatever the next f*cking soundbite is,” Mr Haddock said.

This means there should be more rain forecast soon.

Daily Squib Book

DAILY SQUIB BOOK The Perfect Gift or can also be used as a doorstop. Grab a piece of internet political satire history encapsulating 15 years of satirical works. The Daily Squib Anthology REVIEWS: "The author sweats satire from every pore" | "Overall, I was surprised at the wit and inventedness of the Daily Squib Compendium. It's funny, laugh out loud funny" | "Would definitely recommend 10/10" | "This anthology serves up the choicest cuts from a 15-year reign at the top table of Internet lampoonery" | "Every time I pick it up I see something different which is a rarity in any book"
Disqus Comments Loading...
Share
Published by

Recent Posts

“Biological Sex is a Fact” – NHS SHOCKER!

LONDON - England - The NHS has released shock news that biological sex is a…

23 hours ago

Who Gave the EU the Right to Dictate its Totalitarian Rules on the Internet?

BRUSSELS - Belgium - The EU has ruined the internet with its myriad of totalitarian…

2 days ago

Beyond Satire: Home Office Can’t Find Rwanda Migrants

DOVER - England - According to reports, the Home Office can't find thousands of Rwanda…

2 days ago

Experts: General AI Will Soon be Integrated Into Everything

LONDON - England - General AI is on the verge of being introduced into all…

2 days ago

ANALYSIS: Was Prince Harry Making a Statement in Latest Address?

MONTECITO - USA - Prince Harry made a new appearance wearing military medals on his…

5 days ago

Triggered Woke People and Eco Zealots Encouraged to Choose Euthanasia

SCUNTHORPE - England - A Labour think tank details its proposals for the government to…

6 days ago

This website uses cookies.