Gordon Brown Wants to Come Back to Lead Labour at Next Election

“The world needs saving, and I’m the man to do it. I saved the world three or four times during my reign as supreme leader in chief, and i can do it again. Every day I come up with new exciting ways to save the planet, unlike my former friend Tony who is too busy being a corporate whore. What about the current leader of the Labour party? The little boy, I could crush him with my fist, he is weak, weak, weak,” Mr Brown was overheard saying to his PR adviser on a flight from Dubai last week.

All over Westminster, the news is out. Could Gordo be making a comeback? If so, how will he take out the main players who are in the ring at the moment?

“I can’t wait to see the great clunking beast’s fist dragging along the blood splattered floors of Westminster once again. Gordon is a political behemoth, a man who has vengeance in his eye as he turns his stare back towards posh weakling Cammo and the one who betrayed him, Nick Clegg. Gordon is the only one who has the brute force to kill the Coalition once and for all,” a Westminster political commentator told the BBC.