Cloned Cows Attack Farm Visitors After Vicious Taunts

“Forget about mad cows, the cloned cows are the ones you have to really fear,” Russ Abbot, a farm hand at the Sunnydale clone cow farm has revealed.

According to witnesses who witnessed the tragic attack, the cloned cows who all looked the same, suddenly started galloping towards the group of visitors on a day trip from the nearby town of Alsager.

“There were about sixty cloned cows and a few cloned bulls who came out of the cow shed at the same time. They’re way more intelligent than normal cows and move around with purpose. One of the visitors triggered off the event by teasing one of the cows. He called it a ‘silly clone’ and then he started telling his chums that all the cows looked the same in an obvious loud voice. That’s when one of the cows perked up and seemed to understand; this cloned cow seemed to then tell it’s fellow clones what happened with a few moo’s here and there. I’ve never seen the look of anger as I saw on those clone cows, they were spitting grass cuds they were,” Jimmy Twonails, one of the visitors to the farm told the BBC.

After the stampede, the farmer rescued the visitors, but alas, three people were sadly trampled to death by a number of vicious cloned cows.

A spokesman for the Department for Environment, Food and Rural Affairs, Alan Chipplesblain, told the BBC that the clone farm had now been contained and the cloned cows were currently being moved to a secret location where they will made into juicy cloned steaks and delivered to supermarkets across the country.