Brown Finally Wins a By-election

GLASGOW - Scotland - Ailing prime minister, Gordon Brown has finally won a by-election, albeit in a place where 75% of the population are on Labour benefits.

“I’ve never worked a day in my life and there was no way in hell I would vote for anyone else than Labour. What, and lose my disability benefits, council tax benefits and four bedroom house?” Jock McFartle, told the Guardian whilst playing a round of golf in Glasgow’s premier golf club.

Glasgow has the highest rate of people on benefits in the UK where many households have never had anyone in the house work a day in their lives.

Deep Fried Mars Bars

“I get up in the morning, have a drink, some fags and then it’s off to the post office to pick up my giro of £3,500 per week and then straight down to the pub. At about sixish, I return home and switch on my taxpayer funded 47 inch state-of-the-art plasma television and order a few takeaways and more fuckin’ booze,” Alistair Wallace, 58, who has never worked a day in his life told the New Scotsman newspaper.

Under Labour’s government, the welfare culture is such a big part of Glasgow’s lifestyle now that the key voters for the election were people who did not want to lose their benefits.


“This is a winning strategy for Labour, they will use the leeches in Britain’s society who have everything paid for by people who work. Those benefit scum who are called ‘useless eaters’ and are no use to anyone; are not only a burden on taxpayers but a vote winner for Labour. Gordon Brown’s government does not value anyone who works for a living, instead they are taxed out of existence. Gor
don Brown’s Labour does not value families that work and contribute but instead values the dysfunctional chav detritus who breed indiscriminately and spawn the next generation of dangerous feral killer thugs addicted to benefits, who will never offer anything to society other than chaos,” a man from Glasgow, who works and did not vote for Labour, told the New Scotsman.

Now we know why Gordon Brown had a big smile on his face after finally winning a by-election. The unelected prime minister knows that Britons who are addicted to the welfare culture brought in by Labour, would never throw away their parasitic lifestyles by voting for anyone else.

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