England Fans Embracing Italian Culture by Eating Pizza

SAO PAOLO - Brazil - Last night's lacklustre performance by England leaves the team hanging by a spaghetti noodle for an unsavoury exit if Italy does not win the next two matches.

“Eh paisan, it just like mama cook, eh? I’ma gonna eata dis pizza every day to support Italia,” an England fan said grabbing his crotch and stuffing a few slices of pizza into his mouth.

The next Italy match is crucial to England’s World Cup survival therefore the plan is to be as Italian as possible and support the Italians at every point.

“I’m going to my local Italian restaurant every day until the matches start and learning to talk the lingo. Just had a big bowl of spag bol and started wearing a stylish suit,” England football fan, Jimmy Cutter, told the Sun.

Looks like it’s out with the egg and chips and in with the pasta alla Balotelli.

ADVERTISE ON THE DAILY SQUIB

Email advertising (at) dailysquib.co.uk for all your advertising needs.
  • SUPPORT THE DAILY SQUIB
  • We fight for freedom, justice, satire, and coffee.
  • Disqus Comments Loading...
    Share
    Published by

    Recent Posts

    “I WILL CARRY ON! CHAOS! I WILL CARRY ON! CHAOS! CHAOSSSSS!”

    PLANET SCUNTHORPE - KEIR DAVROS HAS MADE A DEFIANT SPEECH IN DEFENCE OF HIS RULE.

    19 hours ago

    Artificial Intelligence Emerging as a Key Competitive Advantage in Cybersecurity, New Report Finds

    GENEVA - Switzerland - Artificial intelligence is transforming the cybersecurity landscape at an unprecedented pace…

    3 days ago

    Comical Starmer Reassures Labour Party After Election Drubbing

    SCUNTHORPE - England - Comical Starmer has reassured Labour Party members that everything is okay…

    4 days ago

    LOCAL ELECTION RESULTS: “Comrades, everything is okay. Nothing has changed!”

    SCUNTHORPE - England - Comrade Starmer is defiant despite massive Labour Party losses with the…

    5 days ago

    VOTE LABOUR: “Comrades, today I am ordering you to vote for Labour”

    SCUNTHORPE - England - Supreme Comrade Starmer is ordering all citizens of the People's Republic…

    6 days ago

    We’re Giving Away 1,000 FREE Tickets on an EXCLUSIVE Hantavirus Cruise

    SOUTHAMPTON - England - The Daily Squib is giving away 1,000 free tickets on an…

    1 week ago

    This website uses cookies.