Football Hooligans Angry After England Lose 2018 World Cup Bid

LEEDS - England - There were full scale riots today in many major UK cities after the result for the 2018 World Cup was announced.

The English Football Hooligans Association (EFHA) were very disappointed with the FIFA decision to reject England’s bid to host the 2018 World Cup.

“We’ve worked very hard for this bid. We haven’t rioted for more than a week. The 2018 World Cup was going to be an amazing violent event on our home turf smashing heads from all over the world,” Lee Travers, EFHA’s secretary, told the BBC.

44 Years of Hurt

When the announcement was made, hooligans from all over the country couldn’t hold back any longer and rampaged through city centres, libraries, shopping malls and at one town, a pet shop was reduced to rubble.

“I want to know why FIFA have passed over England’s bid? This is f*cking incomprehensible. I’m going to smash Sepp Blatter’s corrupt knee caps in with a baseball bat,” Mr Travers said before wading into a group of policemen in Leeds city centre.

ADVERTISE ON THE DAILY SQUIB

Email advertising (at) dailysquib.co.uk for all your advertising needs.
  • SUPPORT THE DAILY SQUIB
  • We fight for freedom, justice, satire, and coffee.
  • Disqus Comments Loading...
    Share
    Published by

    Recent Posts

    “I WILL CARRY ON! CHAOS! I WILL CARRY ON! CHAOS! CHAOSSSSS!”

    PLANET SCUNTHORPE - KEIR DAVROS HAS MADE A DEFIANT SPEECH IN DEFENCE OF HIS RULE.

    20 hours ago

    Artificial Intelligence Emerging as a Key Competitive Advantage in Cybersecurity, New Report Finds

    GENEVA - Switzerland - Artificial intelligence is transforming the cybersecurity landscape at an unprecedented pace…

    3 days ago

    Comical Starmer Reassures Labour Party After Election Drubbing

    SCUNTHORPE - England - Comical Starmer has reassured Labour Party members that everything is okay…

    4 days ago

    LOCAL ELECTION RESULTS: “Comrades, everything is okay. Nothing has changed!”

    SCUNTHORPE - England - Comrade Starmer is defiant despite massive Labour Party losses with the…

    5 days ago

    VOTE LABOUR: “Comrades, today I am ordering you to vote for Labour”

    SCUNTHORPE - England - Supreme Comrade Starmer is ordering all citizens of the People's Republic…

    6 days ago

    We’re Giving Away 1,000 FREE Tickets on an EXCLUSIVE Hantavirus Cruise

    SOUTHAMPTON - England - The Daily Squib is giving away 1,000 free tickets on an…

    1 week ago

    This website uses cookies.