Footballer's Wife Forgives Footballer's Wallet After Another Indiscretion

MANCHESTER - England - It was business as usual at the Booney household today after another routine prostitution debacle was uncovered by the country's media.

Another week in the world of football. Another footballer caught playing away from home with a prostitute. As scripts go this is pretty standard stuff.

“Wayne was caught having it off with prostitutes while his slapper wife was giving birth to their first child. Is the Pope Catholic? Do bears shit in the woods?” Ronald Eakin, a football agent dealing with Manchester United players told the Mirror.

What about the footballer’s wife? Well, naturally, she being a paid hand herself, will forgive her footballing husband’s many jaunts with the prostitutes because she can’t afford to lose his bulging wallet.

“I’m going to forgive his wallet because I know what it’s like to be paid for sex. That’s all a footballer’s wife is anyway, a trumped up whore with shopping bags coming out of every orifice conceivable,” Colletta Booney told the Sun tabloid.

ADVERTISE ON THE DAILY SQUIB

Email advertising (at) dailysquib.co.uk for all your advertising needs.
  • SUPPORT THE DAILY SQUIB
  • We fight for freedom, justice, satire, and coffee.
  • Reader support keeps the caffeine flowing.
  • Disqus Comments Loading...
    Share
    Published by

    Recent Posts

    DEFENCELESS BRITAIN – The Practical British Prepper: A Three-Month Household Plan

    LONDON - England - Britain is defenceless and bankrupt. It is not too late if…

    4 hours ago

    Why Labour is Destroying British Pubs

    LONDON - England - Labour is destroying British pubs. Across the British Isles, thousands of…

    2 days ago

    King Charles Agrees to Meghan Markle Statue at Buckingham Palace

    LONDON - England - King Charles III has agreed to a Meghan Markle statue to…

    5 days ago

    Dangerous Criminal Disappointed by Early Release Thanks to Labour

    WORMWOOD SCRUBS - England - A dangerous criminal is seriously disappointed with his early release…

    5 days ago

    Comrade Burn’em Residing at His Manchester Dacha For Holiday

    MANCHESTER - England - Comrade Burn'em has retired to his dacha up north after two…

    6 days ago

    Digital Science Launches Papers AI: an AI-Native Researcher Workspace for Writing, Data and Code

    LONDON - England - Digital Science launches Papers AI which gives researchers and students an…

    6 days ago

    This website uses cookies.