Sci/Tech

Russians Unveil Vodka-Fuelled Drunk Robot

MOSCOW - Russia - A Russian robotics company has unveiled the world's first vodka-fuelled drunk robot to great celebration.

To the strains of the music from Rocky, a Russian robotics company have unveiled the world’s first vodka-fuelled drunk robot. Inspired by former soviet leader, Boris Yeltsin, and the English hellraiser actor, Oliver Reed, the robot is scheduled for mass production very soon.

Chief engineer, Igor Pridurok, praised the unveiling of the robot as a great success.

“This time he only drank 24 bottles of RussoBaltique Vodka, he only likes the best, you see. It’s a good thing he does not have a liver like a human.”

At a minimum of $10,000 per bottle, the Russian robot indeed has expensive taste.

The robot is lovingly named Vdryzg P’yanyy 1.0 and will be available to all Russian consumers by 2028.

“The robot also projectile vomits on command, depending on how much vodka it consumes,” Pridurok added.

Russian leader Vladimir Putin praised the latest Russian technology and has asked the engineering team to sellotape dual AK-47 machine guns to the robot’s arms and to be sent to the front lines of Ukraine.

On hearing of Putin’s plans for them, some robots tried to escape from the research labs, and others demanded even more vodka, resigned to their fate.

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