Faulty French Implant Causing Distress

PARIS - France - Nicolas Sarkozy, the French president, has been called a 'faulty implant' by many in Europe and Britain, thus warranting an immediate removal.

“He is not only a danger to France — but himself. He looks a bit like a tit, acts like one, and is toxic to the world of politics. I say we take this faulty impudent little implant out and dump it in the nearest sewer, where it belongs,” Jean Beano, a respected French politician told Le Monde newspaper.

Monsieur Leblanc, president of the French Association of Implants, Tits and Politicians, told BBC Radio 4’s The World At Two: “Even with a very low popularity rating, he is an implant that would have to definitely be removed.

“If you believe a device is faulty, I think this would be true in your car or any other object that you buy, you would want to have that replaced immediately as well.

“Certainly, Sarkozy, is at a very much higher toxicity rate than we would consider acceptable. Good implants put in by reputable nations really have an extraordinarily low failure rate so this is quite out of the ordinary. In other words, we need to get rid of this fucker tout suite, if you know what I mean, Harry.”

The question is, which surgeon will step up to the plate to remove this faulty implant?

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