Woman With Designer Vagina Given Award For Best Vagina Design

A woman with a designer vagina has been given this year’s award for the best vagina design, it has been reported.

Shirley Metcalf, 23, from Frimlington On Sea, was given the prestigious award for her particularly well-designed designer vagina; which is a cosmetic surgery procedure that is all the rage at the moment.

Heaven’s gateway

“Yes, yes, we’ve seen and analysed many vaginas over the past year, but this one in particular had all the immaculate yoni mandorla design qualities we were looking for. What stood out for us was the perfectly trimmed and manicured undercarriage, and the subtle serenity to the trim. The aspect ratio was just right, as well as the juxtaposition of elemental Fibonacci shapes and nuances in tightness within the exquisite, majestic sugar walls. I myself had a test run, and it was as tight and smooth as any drive in a Mercedes-Benz S550e.”

The award ceremony for this year’s best designer vagina went well, although the hall where it was held seemed to be besieged by a deep musty, pungent yet sweet fragrance afterwards. Many of the attendees and vagina experts were seen constantly wiping their glasses from the steam.