LOS ANGELES - USA - Pop mimer Miley Cyrus is to have her mouth sewn shut once and for all, her record company, RCA have announced.
The RCA record executive in charge of Miley Cyrus, Levi Baumberg, told MTV on Sunday night: “We had to do something about the tongue. Sales have been plummeting since she started sticking that thing out, and all the other stuff she does. She has a flat behind and also looks ridiculous when she is shaking it in the cameras. Her tongue scares her audience who are predominantly little pre-pubescant girls from the age of 4-12 and offends the parents of these children. I told her either it’s a sewing job or we drop her from the roster. She doesn’t sing her songs anyway so the sewing job will make no difference to the songs she never wrote.”
Miley Cyrus will be flown to Beijing, China tomorrow where she will undergo the cosmetic operation.
“We chose China because they are experts in sewing peoples’ mouths shut. Don’t worry fans she’ll be back miming by the end of next week,” the executive added.
GRIMSDALE - England - Comrade Starmer speaks about the enemy of the People's Republic of…
MAR-A-LAGO - USA - President Donald Trump has issued a pardon to Vladimir Putin in…
GENEVA - Switzerland - A newly released report by the World Economic Forum reveals that…
LONDON - England - The head of the OBR has been liquidated and processed into…
ESSEX - England - Thanks to Labour's budget, taxpayers will foot the bill for more…
MANILA - Philippines - GameZone Casino is growing in popularity across many online communities as…
This website uses cookies.