Posh Spice Swallows Pea in Dinner Drama

Victoria Beckham were said to be dining at a well-known Los Angeles eaterie when staff and diners underwent a terrifying twenty minutes of total pandemonium.

“We knew she was coming because she had alerted the paparazzi to be at the door when she arrived with the boys. Mrs Beckham who ordered us to have her liquid diet ready, then made a terrible mistake. She ate one of Brooklyn’s peas which was a side dish with his sausage and chips. It was one pea too many. She does not eat solids and her face first went red, then purple and then blue. She was wacking around the restaurant in her couture clothes retching, gasping and projectile vomiting rancid green liquid. Frankly it was an awful spectacle and many diners were traumatised from the whole experience,” Emil Schaffhausen, the restaurant’s manager told MTV.

Diners were also left gagging for sick bags after witnessing the ex-Spice girl puking like a trooper.

“Anyone who knows Victoria Beckham, knows that she never eats solids. We’re still trying to find out what happened. Maybe it was a suicide attempt because she hasn’t eaten solid food for twenty years now and she must have known what would happen after eating the pea,” a close friend of the ‘talented’ pop star told MTV news.

There are even rumours being circulated around LA’s showbiz circuit that Mrs Beckham is ready to sue the restaurant.

“Who told her to eat the pea? No one forced her. Hell, let her sue the restaurant. I never seen the bitch smile anyway. She comes here with her lil boys, like twice a week. We prepare her soup for her then she leaves without saying a word or ever smiling once. I reckon she ain’t human. Maybe the pea got inside her circuitry or something. Who knows?” Mr Schaffhausen said defiantly from his restaurant.

Her husband, David Beckham, is currently in Milan enjoying the attention of the Italian ladies. He was spotted at a charity ball with about twenty hot Italian ladies vying for his attention whilst Mrs Beckham was back in America.