Britney Spears to Release New Raw Singing Christmas Album

She’s back.  Call it born-again pop stardom, the Return of Britney, the She’s Doing it Again. Just don’t call it a comeback.

Britney’s record company has been working overtime to get the new album out for Christmas and is set to be a huge seller breaking all previous sales targets.

Britney’s manager had this to say about the new release: “We want to give something back for the fans. They’ve been with us through the good times and the hard times. This is Britney at her best, you will see her true self, her raw talent I know shines through.”

The new album will showcase Britney’s raw singing talents and for the first time in the pop singers career will show what she really sounds like without any pre-recorded studio mime tracks.

“The sound you hear is actually Britney’s voice through the isolated microphone feed, that’s what she sounds like before the pre-recorded vocals are layered over that. The audience never hears her real voice, they just hear an Antares Autotune rendition of the song and heavily edited studio trickery. The new album will show the world once and for all that Britney is a singer in her own right,” an executive source for Jive Records told the Daily Squib.

The Britney Spears Las Vegas Live and Raw footage will also be released in all cinemas worldwide with a groundbreaking Sony/BMG deal that is sure to break the bank.

Sony is really going for gold with Britney’s second comeback, they are sparing no expense with promo for the new raw Britney; it’s out with the plastic autotune miming princess of fakery and in with the real-deal singer.

“Everything about Britney used to be a about plastic, including her tits. Let us hope that she has turned a new leaf and will be more real,” Ed O’Sullivan, a music critic for Melody Maker magazine opined in his weekly review column.