Starmer: “I did not lie about my lie to appoint Mandelson despite my lies”

Prime Minister Keir Starmer today emphatically denied that he lied about the multitude of lies he told the press and public after appointing paedophile Epstein’s darling Peter Mandelson as a US ambassador to Britain despite him failing security vetting.

Pointing at a blue curtain, Starmer said: “This curtain is red.”

Pointing at a chair, Starmer proclaimed in a calm robotic voice: “This is a potato.”

The PM then said, “I did not lie about my lie to appoint Mandelson despite my lies, and even though those lies were lies, they were warranted lies about lies and should thus be deemed as Labour Party truths.”

“I promised to clean up politics, and this is what I am doing – with more lies. You see if I don’t lie all the time or gaslight everyone, then why am I here? Why does my lie upon lie upon lie define politics so clearly as a blatant lie?” the PM added with conviction.

What about misleading parliament?

When asked about misleading parliament regarding Mandelson’s appointment, Starmer replied, “Can’t you see my lips are moving?”