Socialist Tory Party Disgusted as Conservative Defects to Brigand Bandit Group

Comrades, Kemi Badenoch (William Hague) of the Socialist Tory Party, a wing of the Labour Party with pretty much the exact policies, is very angry today as one of the last conservatives has defected to brigand Farage and his group of bandits.

Another one gone!

Comrade Badenoch addressed the remaining Tory Party of three today in a little room at the Tory HQ.

“Comrades, Suella Braverman has defected to the vile brigand group of bandits led by insurgent terrorist Nigel Farage. She was a proper conservative, you know, with conservative ideas. Her toxic Tory policies were an affront to the socialist/communist ideological base of the socialist Tory Party under the wing of our comrades in the Labour Party. I sincerely hope all three of you are sticking to socialist thoughts and policies that appeal to Labourite Lib Dem/Green Marxist socialism. If I find anyone talking to the brigand, and partisan swine Farage, you too will be thrown into the street without your clothes.”