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People’s Republic of Soviet Britain Introduces “Online Safety Act”

SCUNTHORPE - England - The PRSB has introduced an "Online Safety Act" for your own safety.

Comrades, for your own safety, the People’s Republic of Soviet Britain is introducing the Online Safety Act so that you can be spied on with more frequency. This is for your own good, and our Stasi agents, who have been spying on you for decades, will continue to do so now that the news is official.

Masked as protection for the youth, the wording in our wonderful 500-page document has been deliberately constructed in such a broad manner, utilising vague wording that facilitates an open-ended interpretation allowing us to undermine the very last remaining freedoms we are claiming to defend.

We are merely following other communist regimes like N. Korea, the EU and China, so there is nothing to worry about.

The PRSB has always practiced minimal levels of democracy and privacy, and has always been considered an authoritarian socialist state, so nothing is changing much, this is just an announcement confirming that your freedoms disappeared a very, very long time ago and no one even batted an eyelid.

We hold you with contempt, you, the proletariat scum are disgusting vile creatures to our socialist Marxist Labour Party, but you already knew that as well.

Remember what Comrade Lenin said, “The goal of socialism is communism” and he was 100% correct with his statement of fact.

INGSOC NOTICE 54-91-11-999-111-1-01A-P

PETER LINKPILLOW, 14, OF PESTILENCE AVENUE, HAS BEEN AWARDED A FREE THREE MONTHS SUBSCRIPTION TO PRSB RATED WEBSITE “ONLY STALINS”. HE REPORTED HIS BROTHER, SIX SISTERS, FOURTEEN COUSINS, AND TWELVE PUPILS IN HIS SCHOOL LAST TUESDAY FOR UTILISING VPN SERVICES TO ILLEGALLY ACCESS THE INTERNET. THEY WERE TAKEN AWAY IN THE EARLY HOURS OF WEDNESDAY MORNING AND LIQUIDATED. REMEMBER COMRADES, LOOK, LISTEN, REPORT!

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